Hey, thanks so much for dropping by. I’m Blair Saxon, and it’s been pretty quite around here. My girlfriend, Megan, is pissed off at me and I’m out of beer, but at least I’ve got someone to talk to now!
I’ll have to catch you up a bit with what happened the last few months and then maybe you can help me with the next step. If you think of anything later, you can always put your ideas down in the comments section. Maybe we’ll blow this thing open together.
By the way, I have to do this. I got probation for attacking that guy in his garage, you might remember that. Maybe you saw the newspaper articles or read Al W Moe’s account in his book, Getting Thin is Murder. I mean the book is great, but he left a lot out.
For one thing, I’m ambidextrous. Did he mention that? No. And, I speak three languages. Any mention of that? No. What’s up with that? Plus, he’s supposed to share some of the book sales with me. I’m not sure how many he has to sell at 99-cents to actually share anything with me, but he could come by with a six-pack once in a while, right?
Anyway, I can’t believe I got probation, it should have been my sister, but don’t tell anyone I said that. I just got some info from the guy and he almost killed me. His biceps were like bowling balls. My sister took a much simpler approach to get a little revenge, she torched his car. A collector car, a muscle car. No insurance. Bummer! Oops, don’t repeat that either. I mean, she’s a lawyer and all. Forget I said that.
Kat was just sticking up for me, and I appreciate it. You don’t want to mess with her. She’s tiny, but lethal. She’s like that guy, you know, Adam Ant, no, the guy who can sing. No, that was mean of me. You know…yeah, thanks, Ant-Man. The superhero guy. Anyway, if my sister was Ant-Man or Ant-Woman, she’d probably fly up your ass and rip out your intestines, so listen, don’t ever repeat that, and don’t mess with her. Now, where was I? Oh, yeah.
So, let me tell you a little more, and then I’ll get started on what I’m working on right now. They say pictures tell the story, so here’s a picture of me playing pro baseball in Scottsdale.
That’s me, way over in left field (that’s the far right in the picture).You can’t tell because my buddy Al was sitting way up in the special “all you can eat and drink” section with his hot wife. He’s not much of a photographer.
What? Sorry, it took me a second to understand the question. I took a fastball in the ear and that’s why I’m not playing anymore. That and I blew out my knee at the same time. I’m alright, I just have what Megan calls a “blurting” problem. I think of it as being honest. And, sometimes I ramble.
And, back to your question, yes, I made some bucks. Mostly because I got a good signing bonus. I went to San Diego State and if I had broken all of Tony Gwynn’s hitting records I could have gotten more, but he was really good, I mean like the God of hitting, but I did pretty well. A good bonus. Of course, I drank most of it. What was left I used to help pay for a lawyer who represented a bunch of people who got sick using mislabeled and dangerous “healthy” products from Carespot. They are still in business, but the owners got taken down a peg.
And, they killed my mother. Or, my father killed my mother. Nevermind, I’m still dealing with that, and it’s all in the book, so why go over it again? I did have issues with the murders, but that’s another thing that won’t go away. They are still on my mind, and I have to fix that somehow. That and my relationship with Megan. She’s the only one who gets me. Well, her and you, but you won’t cook for me, will you?
Listen, thanks for coming by. Maybe you’ll get that book that Al wrote, and maybe you’ll stop by again, say Sunday or Monday? I’d like to tell you what I’m doing now. I’ll try not to ramble, but it’s coming from me, you know, first person. Not like what Al wrote in the book, third person. It will be a lot easier if I just talk to you. See you next week, and bring some beer, alright?